Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentines Day

"Elle button your pants up and get off the floor. Frito, well, stopping licking Eliza's fingers you're going to die from a sugar over dose."

Eliza was sprawled on her bedroom floor wallowing in self pity, or maybe it was a sugar coma.  So hard to say on Valentines day when someone is without a Valentines.  Eliza knew it was a hallmark holiday, she knew that the day was only created to sell flowers and chocolates and make everyone pretend they had the perfect relationship.  Or at least this is what single woman across the glob told themselves.  But, alas, in the end it didn’t matter what one told themselves, they were still alone on the most fake romantic holiday of the year.

"Jules, I'm dying." Eliza lifted her head off the floor to look at her friend before promptly dropping it the floor again with a thud.

"Good knock some sense into that head of yours.  Anyway, based on the little red boxes everywhere I'd say you're going to be hurting from a candy heart overdose.  Get up, we have to detox you."

"Ouch, my stomach," Eliza groaned in pain. "I couldn't help it I had to eat them all, I want my wish or fortune or whatever it is to come true.”

Julianne shook her head for a second then started to laugh. "I think you have fortune cookies and candy hearts mixed up?" Julianne replied. "You have to eat the whole cookie for your fortune to come true.  I am not sure there is anything about candy hearts.  Besides half of them don’t make any sense.  I think one of them that I got said something about texting?"

"Oh right, fortune cookies. Well it couldn't hurt right? I mean anything’s worth trying.  I’d take a text from a secret admirer.  Text, tweet, post on my wall, good old fashioned note or card, whatever."

Eliza felt Julianne’s gaze boring down into her. "Okay, seriously? You could have a Valentine if you or Ray stopped being such dorks at life."

Eliza pushed herself into a sitting position making Frito readjust his position in order to continue licking excess sugar from Eliza. Eliza felt the sic box value pack of gross chalk hearts slosh around in her stomach and groaned.  She very well could have groaned over the thought of Ray and it’s complexity too, maybe it was a double groan.

"No, nope. Ray and I are friends, study partners. Either way I don't want to ruin things if a romantic, or not so romantic, relationship doesn't work."

Julianne put her hands out for Eliza to grab.  Eliza grabbed on and felt like she was a huge load being hoisted up by construction equipment.

"Elle, you should think out going to the gym to work off those little hearts. We're past the freshmen fifteen; I don't think we can blame college and the adjustment anymore."

Eliza looked down and her jaw dropped. She had a baby, a candy heart, too much pie at Christmas food baby that is.

"Oh." Eliza patted her not so perfect tummy. "Happy Valentines Day to me, let's head to the gym." Ahh the romance of it all.  Actually it probably was the best time to go to the gym, the only people who would be working out anything would be single woman and maybe a few men.  Men had a tendency to write off the stupid holiday and most women tried to do anything to not look pathetic on the stupid holiday. 

Several minutes later Eliza was doing the too small pant shimmy. "Is it a bad sign when your stretchy yoga pants aren't fitting as well as they did a few weeks ago?"

"Let me see," came the exasperated voice of Julianne. "Elle. You're a little nutty; they look fine.  Way to make it dramatic; toss a t-shirt on so we get home in time for the Valentines Day marathons on TV."

Eliza grabbed a shirt from the basket of clean clothes that were begging to be folded a week ago and were now too far gone with wrinkles to care. "Right. Ready."

Eliza walked into the tiny living room where Julianne had begun stretching, ever the over achiever. Eliza stopped and stared.

"Jules are you trying to make me look bad? Ugh, let me get my keys."

With those words Julianne removed herself from and awkward stretch where she was balancing on one leg to intercept Eliza's path. She spread her arms and blocked the doorway to the kitchen.

"No! Counter productive, we walk."  With that Julianne grabbed onto Eliza's shoulders and steered her to the door. As Eliza opened the door she saw a hand that was poised to knock.

"Ray?"  Eliza stopped dead in her tracks.  Ray never just stopped by, he always sent a text or called or sometimes even sent a e-mail.  He never just stopped by, and what normal, not insane man stopped by on Valentines day?

“Uh, oh.  Hi. Are you, uh, on your way out?”  He dropped his hand quickly in a surprised almost nervous manner.  Ray was fidgeting with something behind his back as he looked at Eliza, or well looked above her head, at the door and then at her feet.

“Well, I was heading to the gym.  Its been a rough day already.”  Eliza stared at Ray a little confused a little breathless.  Her heart had jumped at the sight of him.  Everyone wants their prince to come rescue them and on Valentines Day of all days is a good time for said prince to come galloping in.  Okay, so Eliza realized there was no horse involved but he was a man all the same, and he was at her door on what she was so lovenly calling ‘Singles Awareness Day.’ 

“Oh, well, I uh.  Right.  I was just going to ask if you wanted to, you know.”  He paused for a few seconds and then with warp like speed he thrust a pink rose at Eliza. 

Well that was graceful wasn’t it,  Eliza thought. Her heart was racing a little faster but she was having a hard time controlling a small smile that was widening on her face by the minute.  A rose, he’d brought her a rose, was all she could think of; that and how nervous and awkward he looked. 

“Here.  For you.  I wanted to know if you wanted to go to dinner with me and the guys.”  Ray almost said this in rapid fire, as if he said it any slower he wouldn’t be able to get it out. 

“Oh, the guys?”  Eliza’s smile was gone, it fled her face faster then a five second quarter mile.

“Oh for craps sake.  Really?  Ray?  Really?  A group dinner?  You brought Elle a rose to invite her out to a group dinner?  How dense are you?”  Julianne was chastising Ray as Eliza regained her composure.  

“Okay, Jules, thanks.  Uh, well I guess it would be okay.”

Julianne gave Eliza a death glare.  “Well apparently it’s the best offer you are going to get from him so, yeah, its okay.  Between the two of you I swear.  Well Ray, what time do I have to have Cinderella here to the ball?”  

Ray looked a little stunned; he took a step back almost trying to slink away from the wrath of Julianne.  Eliza felt a little bad for Ray, but she still wasn’t over the fact that she had thought he was asking her on a date just to hear the word, guys.  She still hadn’t really abandon that she thought the whole dating Ray idea might be a disaster for their friendship but it might have been nice to try and if it weren’t her idea then she couldn’t be at fault if things ended.  

“Uh, seven at the Irish pub?”  Ray said with little confidence.

“Okay, seven.  A pub really?  How unromantic.  Well whatever, I will get her there.  We are still going to go work out so please step aside.  Gee’s Ray really?  A group date?”  Julianne was shaking her head as she was pushing Eliza out the door forcing Ray to back away and off the front stoop.

“I well.  I just thought.”  Ray was cut off by Julianne again.

“No there was no thought, or well maybe the Rose was a thought but other then that I’m not sure there was thought.  Of course Miss. Articulate here isn’t much better.  You two are made for each other.”  

“Thanks Ray.  See you at seven,” wall all Eliza could manage to get out with Julianne pushing her down the sidewalk and her brain still not quite caught up to what her heart wanted and what had really just happened.

“Jules what am I going to do with the rose?  I should go put it inside.”

“Nah, maybe some burly man will see if and think its some sort of challenge or something.  Maybe it will inspire some kind of competition at the gym.”

Eliza and Julianne walked away from the house, away from Ray and towards the improvement of Eliza’s candy heart baby.  Eliza’s thoughts were stuck on Ray and what the heck she was going to do with him or for that matter what it is she should do with him.  Even with the odd date it was still the closest gesture to romance Ray had made in the semesters they had been studying together; on top of that she had plans for Valentines day.  Sure it was with more then one man and none of them were most likely going to propose to her but it was still better then Julianne’s marathons of chick flicks, red velvet cake and Julianne’s boyfriend painting her toe nails. Okay, so the red velvet cake was actually probably better then even a dinner with a man.

Friday, February 3, 2012

Sicker then the Dog

For the few reading Eliza's adventures i am curious to know your feedback?  Be it good or constructive criticism I am always open to suggestions, questions and of course praise :-)


"No Frito. Mommy needs her sleep." Eliza's buried her head beneath pillows, rolled to face the wall and blindly waved the hand she wasn't laying on in the direction she was pretty sure poor little Frito was in.

Another creak of the door.  Eliza was making a mental note to get some WD-40 after she felt more human and less like a stuff potato head.  Her head was so congested it felt like it had swelled to three times the size of its normal size. Eliza groaned imagining Fritos tiny, non congested, had slowly pushing her bedroom door open, his hind quarters inching up.

"Baby I said no. Mommy's head could explode at any minute. You don't need to see that."

"Baby? I didn't think we were there yet," came an unexpected yet familiar male voice.

Eliza slowly rolled over keeping her head mostly buried. Peeking out an eye she saw Ray.

"Bad Frito. You're a horrible guard dog." Eliza sniffled and groaned again.

"He's a great welcome mat even if he isn't so good at scaring people off. Anyway how are you doing sniffles?"

Eliza groaned and came out from under her pillows. "Hi Ray. How do you think I'm feeling?". Eliza pulled her blankets over her head this time. Why did Ray have to stop by when she was at her worst for crying out loud! She doubted she was go to remembering this along with the WD-40 but second mental not of the day was to revoke Ray's emergency key and make sure to never let him see her sick or puffy eyed again.  Hair and make-up would be done from now on. 

"So glad you’re happy to see me. And, well, I think Medusa is a bit harsh for your look. You do have that wild cat lady hair thing going for you though."  Ray paused and Eliza watched as a grin spread across his mouth.  His mouth, surrounded by a five o'clock shadow was actually invoking some healing qualities, as in her girl parts were awake even if her head wasn't playing in the game.  That can't be a normal reaction, could it? Eliza wondered at her thoughts as she watched Ray's smile falter.

"Uh, right.  Okay.  So anyway on that note. Why are you here?"  asked Eliza in the least annoyed or flustered tone she could muster.  She hoped her voice was more annoyed then flustered no matter what she sounded like.

"Aw come on you know I'm just messin. I brought my notes from today’s classes." Ray was dangling a set of notes in front of Eliza. "But with an attitude like that I'm not sure I'm going to share anymore."

"Oh, thanks. You're an angle."  Eliza reached up her hand in time for Ray to pull the notes away.

"What do i get in return for being so angelic?"  Ray asked, his smile full and his eyes sparkling in mischief.

Eliza couldn't help but smile back.  The thought occurred to her that Ray, her study partner, the shy Ray, was actually flirting with her.  She coughed and moaned.  Thankful for the cold, because there was a second where paralysis almost set in.  She wasn't really sure how to react to flirty Ray.  The blip she'd felt has continued, in fact it was more flip like now but that didn't mean she'd lost her mind and wanted to ruin their friendship.  

"Okay kid.  Sorry.  Here you go.  Actually i stopped by the copy center and got you copies so you didn't have to worry about rewriting them right now.  I would suggest reading the physics stuff and maybe the Thermo stuff but the rest can wait.  Anything else you need before i leave so you can rest"

“Um…”  Eliza paused.  She had he sudden urge to reach out past the notes and pull him to her bed.  Apparently she wasn’t as sick as she’d thought.   Instead of fully acting on her thoughts she took the notes and the hand he’d extended with them.  “Uh, Ray.”

“Yes?”  A hopeful edge beneath his tone.

“Well I was wondering.  You know if.”  And before Eliza could say anything else Ray, who had been taking a few steps closer to her, creeping ever closer to her, tripped over Frito’s sausage like body and landed onto Eliza.  Their faces mere inches apart and Eliza gasping for air.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Cinnamon Rolls and gifts and Christmas, Oh My!


Eliza woke early for Christmas morning.  She would love to have thought that it was all due to the excitement of gifts under the tree or excitement to see her family but, well it wasn’t.  Her parents had jetted off to Ireland this time.  They hadn’t really grown up, in fact with her in College they seemed to have reverted back to their twenty-something’s where they never had really been all that careful hence their oop’s, her.  This wonderful Christmas morning she stretched and sniffed the air.  Ahh, that had been what woke her.

She stumbled out of the guest room and down the hall of her home away from home.  Julianne’s house was where Eliza spent countless holidays and plenty more weekends.  She shuffled her way to the kitchen and saw Julianne’s mom, Mary who was named aptly since this was also the name of the woman who was mother of the reason for the season, two selfless people. She was standing at the oven, both hands in potholders humming Jingle Bells.  The scene was something in-between Mrs. Walton and Charlotte from sex and the city.  The kitchen was country sheik, warm yet contemporary and up to date.  Add Mary, the mom extraordinaire, in her apron and stylish look you had the most welcoming yet picture worthy situation in the world.  As Eliza walked into the kitchen her worries and cares seemed to melt away and revert back to those of a thirteen year old girl. The time between life and childhood.  

“That smells wonderful what are you making.”

“Oh hello dear.  Go get Julianne up.  I made you girls cinnamon rolls.”  Mary smiled and beamed, had she been eight she might have been bouncing off the walls with excitement.  If the full on Santa sleigh display in the front yard, complete with Rudolph and all his reindeer cohorts didn’t tell you how much she loved Christmas one would just need to take a step into the house.  Once in the door your senses were accosted by the smell of pine tree and cinnamon.  They had not one or two but three Christmas trees.  The smelly pinecones, the ones in a bag that stink of all the stores during the holidays, were also hung, stuffed into bowls or placed strategically around the house.  The bright side was that the bathrooms always smelled strongly of cinnamon giving the impression that nothing bad could or would ever occur in such a place.  Mary had festive tissue box covers and fabric that stretched over the toilet seats even.  If you could walk more then five feet in any direction and not see something garnished in Christmas you were in the wrong house. 

“Okay.  I’ll be right back. You’re the best adoptive mother I could ask for.  Make sure I get the biggest one,” Eliza said as she walked back the way she’d come to get Julianne out of her bed.

“Julies, wakey, wakey.”

Julianne stirred and pulled the comforter over her face.  “Go on without me.  I love my bed and I don’t need anything else.”

“There’s cinnamon rolls just waiting to be eaten in the kitchen,”  Eliza said, trying to be as persuasive as possible.

“Now that you mention it I guess I could use some food.”  She threw the blankets off nearly hitting Eliza.  “Okay, I’m up let’s go.”

After breakfast had disappeared, full bellies the only proof that it had indeed existed, the girls went into the living room where the largest of the three trees stood bright and cheery.  A small group of packages sat under the tree wrapped pristinely, begging to be opened.  Eliza’s few gifts that she had brought stood out with their Christmas wrapping paper displaying Disney Princesses.  Before Juliannes parents joined them to continue on the life long tradition of opening gifts Julianne slipped a small package into Eliza’s hands.

“What’s this?” asked Eliza studding the thing.  She flipped the box noting that it didn’t match the wrapping Julianne’s family used. 

“It’s from Ray.  He asked me to give it to you since he couldn’t stick around for Christmas,”  said Julianne. She was nearly at the edge of the couch falling off.  “Open it already.”

“Shouldn’t I wait for your parents?” 

“No, this isn’t part of our Christmas.  So open it before I die of curiosity.”

“You know Jules sometimes I think you are more like a ten year old trapped in the body of an adult.  But fine.”  Eliza’s hands were practically shaking.  She couldn’t figure out what or why Ray would have given her.  She felt even worse knowing she hadn’t gotten him anything.  She added it to her mental sticky note list to buy him a gift card or something.  She almost crindged at the idea of a gift card,  she was praying that Ray might have bought her something else although she didn’t want to get her hopes up. 

It was so weird that the small gift was making her heartbeat speed up a little in excitement, she felt a smile on her face that had been involuntary.  She wasn’t sure when these feelings had really started but it was nice.  It was nice to feel something for someone as wonderful as Ray, although there was the pesky issue of what if it ruined the friendship.  Oh well, she mentally sighed and realized she’d over analyze the situation later.

“Elle, come on.  Open the stupid thing.”

Eliza tore the wrapping, that was surprisingly neat for Ray.  The box was square but flat like a standard jewelry box that you get at department stores.  Her stomach blipped again, jewelry, that would be nice or maybe it wouldn’t.  She needed to sort through her feelings before she could accept jewelry.  Slowly, savoring the experience of her first gift from Ray, she pulled off the lid.  A note, a yellow post it note actually, sat on top of whatever the gift was. 

Dear Eliza,
Merry Christmas.  Now you have one too. 
Yours Raymond
P.S. The biscuit is for Frito
P.P.S. Next year I will do better

Removing the little yellow cryptic note Eliza saw, that yes indeed there was a milk bone and next there was a orange eraser stick, the kind that you could push up more eraser as needed sort of like a mechanical pencil.  Eliza let out a loud and happy laugh.  Ray got her an eraser, she always used his, in fact he allowed her to borrow it for their last test.  What he used she hadn’t been certain.  It was such a small gift but it meant something too, he cared about her, or well he cared about her homework anyway.  

Now to over analyze what ‘Yours’ meant.

Friday, November 25, 2011

Thankful for What?

"Step away from the turkey," said Eliza. It was more to herself then it was to anyone else overeating. Eliza was sitting around the table with Julieanne, Ray, Julieanne's mother and their newly adopted mutt Frito, as in the chip. Julienne's dad was stuck in Europe-it was just rude that European business doesn't close for Thanksgiving.

Eliza looked around the table, she was Thankful for her group of friends, she had somewhere to go since her parents had decided on an impromptu vacation to Mexico without her. It also worked out that her and Julieanne were around for Ray, who shockingly couldn't get back home thanks to an eastcoast snow storm. Frito was most likly thankful that he finally had a home and as luck would have it a household that loved fritos.

"Okay if I don't step away right now I'm going to look like the turkey, stuffed with my butt stuck in the air.  And sadly I would look nearly as appealing." Eliza pushed herself away just to get wedged into the corner further by the motley dog. "No, no turkey for you. Remember you have a sensitive stomach?"

Ray smiled at Eliza.  She suddenly felt a small blip, not a full on flip but something.  She wasn't sure what that meant since it was Ray, her friend, her study partner, her partner in crime. 

"Aww look at the too of you.  Bonding over Turkey.  You both kind of cute, his stomach touches the ground and your button is popped on your jeans," Ray said, thankfully still giving Eliza that cute boyish smile that was causing the blip. 

"Hey mister, the button is popped so I can do this."  She bent down and started to rub Fritos little belly.  He wasn't fat yet, he wasn't even close but they were trying hard to make up for lost time while he had been goodness knows where out in the world.  "It's like Buda, you rub it for good luck." 

"Yeah i see the good luck coming right up," Ray said with a little chuckle.

"Where is my quiet study partner.  I don't like this lip.  If this is what i get for inviting you to Thanksgiving, getting you out of your studious element you can count out a Christmas invitation."

"Aw, come on.  No Christmas with you and Buda here?  Well that means wherever i go i might have a chance at the Turkey." 

"Well, I.  Oh, well that’s just.  How rude."  Eliza was speechless if not a little surprised.  She never heard Ray give her so much crap before, it was usually their other partner in crime.  She realized that maybe Ray was only quiet because he was constantly over shadowed.  There was that blip again, she thought.  Then she felt a little rumble, okay maybe it was a blip, and maybe it was from Ray but nope, this was defiantly a rumble and it was not from Ray. Eliza was kind of hoping everyone could leave soon because she wasn't sure her digestive system was loving the Turkey she had just devoured in record time.

Yes it was certain, Eliza was thankful for a lot, she was thankful for her friends, she was thankful for the food, she was suddenly thankful for those deep brown eyes and boyish smile that Ray kept flashing her and she would be even more thankful if the Turkey didn’t cause her indigestion, heartburn or the need to spend the remainder of the afternoon in their too small, outdated bathroom.

Happy  Thanksgiving - I hope your bellies were full!

Friday, November 11, 2011

Eliza and a Boy

Note: Time is passing, this not the next day to the last post.
“I’m not really sure I want to know what’s going on Eliza,” said Ray, one of Eliza’s study partners.  Eliza could feel the warmth in her eyes, the puffiness and both were most likely beyond apparent.  The burning that had to signify that her eyes were bright red was a huge reminder that she’d spent most of the night and day crying.

“No, it’s okay.  I’m over it, it’s fine.”  She sniffled a little before wiping at her swollen eyes and digging out a pen and a notebook so they could get down to business, getting homework done; even if all she wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep away the heartbreak. 

“Right, fine.  You look fine.  Len, she looks great right?  Why would we guess anything is wrong?” asked Ray, sarcasm very plain in his voice.

Len made up the remainder of their little nerd herd of a group, Eliza had actually made them t-shirts last Christmas that had said “Enginerding” since they were engineers and nothing they talked about made sense to most of the known world.  It was like everyone in their department was from outer space and everyone, all three of them in the group, had developed their own language to describe something as simple as a triangle and the three lines that made it up.

“Oh shut it, you two.  I’m fine. Let’s get back to this.  I’ve plotted these equations but something is very wrong so I am pretty sure we are off somewhere,” said Eliza, gesturing to some graph paper that had been erased so many times it was starting to wear thin where she had attempted to plot.  It was so worn in fact the graph lines were nearly invisible.  A tear rolled down her nose and landed in a very warn spot that when she went to wipe it away the spot dissolved leaving a hole.

“Len, smack her.  We don’t have time for girl stuff.  Spit it out,” said Ray.

“Eliza, seriously put on your big girl pants.  We’re guys and our attention spans are about as long as it takes to chug a beer.  Be happy Ray over here has a heart of gold,” Len paused, and finished the rest under his breath.  “At least when it comes to you, poor sap.”

Eliza wasn’t listening she was distracted and had started to doodle some more in the corner of her paper.  She looked up when she heard a small thud from Ray apparently punching Len in the shoulder.

“Ouch, that was a jerk move,” said Len.  “You’re such a chicken.”

“What did I miss?”  Eliza looked at the two of them knowing she was missing something obvious but couldn’t see it.  She was too consumed with the fact she’s just, well last night she’d just, found the theater major practicing the wedding night scene from Romeo and Juliet in his bed and without the scripts.

“Right,” said Ray, a look in his eyes that Eliza just couldn’t figure out.  “Well, uh.  I will be right back. Len hold down the fort.”
Eliza watched Ray walk out pulling his cell phone from his pocket.  “Okay, let’s get this fixed.”

“Sure, sure, one second though.  You do know that Ray has a thing for you right?”

Eliza felt her face burn a little, her cheeks no doubt turning rosy to match her swollen eyes.  “I uh, well no, I don’t think he does.”

“No, he does.  Believe me.”

“Well, how come he’s never asked me out of anything. He’s never done anything to show he likes me.”

Len’s face said it all, his raised eyebrows and his smirk like smile told Eliza he thought she was dumb.  “Right.  Because every guy would go back into six bars to find the purse you think you lost just to realize it’s in the back seat.  I still won’t let him live that down.  You don’t see me doing that, even for my girlfriend.”

“He’s just a good guy.”  Eliza was slouching in her chair now, she really felt bad.  She knew that Ray did a lot for her, but she did things for him too, heck there were times she even thought about kissing him, the long nights when they’d had to do not one, not two but three runs to the local coffee shop.  She’d almost thought those thoughts were from the lack of sleep, but his looks had always made her feel beautiful, smart and well, cared for, if she had to admit it.  But the timing had always be off she told herself and she was imaging his feelings.

“You two are made for each other, your both idiots.  You two flirt like crazy.  And I’m going out on a limb here but Mr. Perfect has just stepped out of your life for one reason or another, judging from the crying thing, that or your fish died.  So now the timing is right.”

“I think you have it all wrong Len, I mean with Ray not me.  Yes I’m single, again,”  she paused as Ray came back in the room.  He was holding an extra large pizza that if Eliza had to guess was a double pepperoni with garlic sauce, her favorite.

“Here.  I ordered this when I heard your voice over the phone and I know pizza always cheers you up.”

Len just stared at Eliza and then turned to look at Ray.  Eliza could read him perfectly; he was telling her as plain as day, “I told you so.”  Poor Ray looked at them and had no idea, clueless, wide eyed and sweet as sweet can be.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Eliza Against the Candy Corn

Happy Halloween even if it is a little late.  Better late then never i always think. 


“White, orange or yellow?  Where to start.  White or yellow, white or yellow.” 

“If you are talking about snow I’d go with the white.  Yellow isn’t a good sign,” Julianne said walking past Eliza dropping her bag to the floor and flopping on her bed. 

Eliza was sitting crossed legged on her own bed with a bowl and a bag.  Had this been any other time of year maybe Eliza could pass off the idea that she was filling the bowl of candy to set out for everyone who visited, but it wasn’t any other time, it was Halloween.  This was the most dangerous time of the year; Candy Corn was easily obtained and was safe to call Eliza’s kryptonite.

“Seriously El, what are you doing?”

“I’m trying to figure out the best way to eat a candy corn.  If I start at the white end I eat them twice as fast, but if I start on the yellow end they seem to last longer.”

“Really El?  The way you eat them I don’t think you are going to save yourself any calories either way.  Just indulge, there is a reason they are only available one time a year.”

Eliza sighed and dropped the candy corn she had been analyzing just to pick it back up and popped it in her mouth, yellow side in first, but she ate the whole thing in one bite anyway.

“Step away from the candy corn dish.  Step away El,” said Julianne, as she seemed to tip toe towards Eliza acting as if Eliza was a rabid dog that might bite.

“Back away Jules.  You know how I get around this time of year.”

“You get this way one time each month, this month it just happens to coincide with Halloween and there’s candy corn available.  So don’t give me that crap, you still need to fit into your costume we bought you, so step away.”

“Whatever Jules.  I don’t care go to the party yourself.  I am not going, I don’t feel much like partying right now.  I just want to lay here and feel bloated.”

“Really?  I can’t believe you just said that.  I can’t be Betty without her Wilma what would Fred think?”

Eliza raised one eyebrow and looked a Julianne with amusement and a hint of fake irritation.  “Maybe Fred will finally realize he’s useless and Wilma finally wised up and left him.” Eliza smiled, popped another candy corn into her mouth and said, “Don’t you think you took this a little far?”

Julianne shook her head.  “Heck no.  You should see the muscles on Barney and well Fred, well let’s say it should make up for the scooter.”

“Ugh fine.”  Eliza took the bowl of candy corn and placed it outside the door, free candy didn’t last long around the dorm so this was probably a smart move on her part, for her waistline at least.

“Alright Betty where’s my animal skin and femur for my hair?”

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Day 100 and something...Eliza and the Scooter

I thought i would continue from last week and see how it goes.  I will have to do a special Post for Halloween.  Happy Reading.  Please feel free to tell me your thoughts.
Eliza walked back into the dorm feeling a bit worn.  She reached her hand up to her head and felt around; it really didn’t even seem worth it to run her fingers through the rat’s nest that at one point had been her silky straight hair. 

“Oh, wow. Okay so I was apparently correct that he doesn’t have a car?”

“Uh, yeah.  You were right.  It was a scooter.  A scooter of death really. I am not cut out for a motorized contraption that small.  I thought we were going to die.”

“Oh dear.  I’m sorry.  You think that he would have planned better, or at least had a helmet or something for you.  The windblown look isn’t a good look.”

Eliza shook out her hair, and then looked in the mirror on the back of their door.  “He did.”

“Oh, well.  Maybe its not that bad?  He’s still cute right?” asked Julianne.

Eliza paused in thought before answering.  “How cute is cute enough to have to look like this each date?”  Eliza gestured to her hair.

“Maybe you two can walk everywhere?”

“Yeah sure.  That leaves us with Hooters, McDonnell’s, the Library Bar and Subway.  Romantic choices. But good news I can get a variety of food and enough liquor that I might be able to drown out any expectations that might creep in.”

“Okay, so he has a scooter.  The good news he seems mentally sane.  That must be  an improvement from nut number two that you dated for four days before he introduced you to his  ‘special friend’ Brad right?” asked Julianne, who was very obviously grasping at straws.

Eliza sighed.  “Yes, I am still unsure if I was actually dating him or if he was just trying to use me to show to his parents.  I am fairly positive he had some issues with who he was and what his parents would accept and so on.  He wasn’t crazy, but I sort of felt like the third wheel on my own dates.  I have horrible taste in men.  On a positive note I made a good friend once we ironed out that I was not the girl for him, now we have the best coffee dates ever.”

“Okay but if you pick one more head case I’m buying you a plant.  You seem to nurture everything; or you at least try to fix everything.  So if that’s your goal a plant should do the trick, maybe help you with the need to take care of everything.  You have yet to pick a fully functional guy.”

“Like your taste is much better,” was all Eliza could say.  Julianne stared at her intently.

“Uh huh.  No pointing fingers at the moment.  Lets recap, there was the guy who was gay,” Julianne said, before Eliza could interupt.

“In my defense he wasn’t out and he was super hot.”

“Right, whatever.  Then there was the momma’s boy, he couldn’t even leave the house without calling home and his mother only lives ten minutes away.  Then there was Lord of the Rings guy.”

“Okay, but in his defense he was the Elf and everyone knows how hot Orlando Bloom was.  Besides it was Halloween when we met, who knew he actually wore the pointy ears all the time.”

“My point is, you have horrible taste.  It’s like you need a fairy godmother or a guardian angel.”

“Jules, what do you think you are?  I mean definitely not the angel but you could be sort of the fairy godmother.”  Eliza smiled at her best friend and couldn’t help but laugh.

“I find that assessment a little off.  I’m an angel, I’ve just fallen.”  That last statement made by Julianne was followed by the two girls laughing contently as Julianne picked up a brush and started to untangle Eliza’s hair. 

Lucky in love wasn’t a phrase she’d be using any time soon as she winced at the tug the brush made.  Each stroke pulled make Eliza’s eyes tear up, perhaps men liked bald woman?  It would certainly fix the whole helmet and scooter dilemma.  Trying to be thankful for something Eliza was certain the one constant in her life would be Julianne, she prayed at the same time that steady stream of bad dates and weird men would not be.